Multiple Sclerosis and What It Means for Me
I haven't written in a really long time but I wasn't exactly sure how to share this news any other way.
I'm going to start from the beginning for those of you who haven't been informed. Back in July of 2014, I woke up and noticed my left arm felt a little funny. The best way I can describe it is half-asleep but still totally useable. I still had feeling in my arm but couldn't feel texture as well. For example, I couldn't really tell the difference between the way my hair felt and the way my clothes felt. This feeling progressed until it was basically consuming my left side from the waist up, and then regressed until it was just in the tips of my fingers. I talked to my aunt about it (Nancy, I seriously don't know what I would do without you. You are an angel.) and we decided it would be a good idea to see my doctor. She referred me to a neurologist, who then sent me to get an MRI of my brain and of my spinal cord. Once he had seen the results, he decided to send me to a Multiple Sclerosis specialist. All of this happened in a period of about a week and I really didn't understand.
Basically, the MRIs revealed that I had "scars" on both my spinal chord and my brain. This was a hard pill to swallow for my dad and I. We've both spent so much time in hospitals over the last 10 years and because of my mom, we automatically assumed the worst. She had breast cancer, but eventually it spread to her brain. She had to have the tumor removed and it was one of the scariest days of our lives. When I got the call from my neurologist, I broke down in the middle of the UNO library (thanks for letting me sob on your shoulder Lisa).
When I saw the specialist, he wasn't ready to diagnose me with MS. He could see scars that suggested MS and the "numbness" in my arm was also an indicator, but without more proof, he couldn't make a diagnosis. (p.s. the numbness in my arm had subsided by this point)
Fast forward to last Wednesday. I took a hot bath and noticed that my arm felt the same numbness that I had felt in July. Panicked.
Fast forward again to today (June 4, THE DAY BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY). Another MRI and an appointment with my specialist. The numbness in my arm has decreased and is strongest in my fingers. My specialist says heat often "wakes up" an old MS attack, which would explain the numbness I feel now. This isn't dangerous and does no damage, may just be kind of annoying. A few more scars have appeared on my brain and I have been officially diagnosed with Relapsing-Remitting Multiple Sclerosis.
- a chronic, typically progressive disease involving damage to the sheaths of nerve cells in the brain and spinal cord, whose symptoms may include numbness, impairment of speech and of muscular coordination, blurred vision, and severe fatigue.
So what does it mean for me? Well, I'm not really sure. It's really confusing and scary for my dad and I. We are happy to have an answer but not so happy with the answer. Right now we are looking at treatment options. There is no cure for MS, but medication will slow progression, basically increasing the time between "attacks." As of right now, the disease is mild. We hope it stays that way.
I couldn't be more thankful for my incredible support system. These things can be really difficult without my momma by my side, though I know she is with me always. Also I apologize that all of my posts are so depressing. This was the best way I knew how to share.
